Tuesday, April 1, 2008

How to deal with Parental Separation Anxiety?

A lot of moms out there know that Separation Anxiety isn't just for our little ones. A lot of you surely felt acutely nervous when your child begins school. Since I'm considering my 3 year toddler to enter nursery this coming school year, I'm already dealing with this kind of stress just thinking about it. I'm already worrying about Sam's adjustment away from me, and will surely miss spending more time with my so ever precious bundle of joy. I know that introducing her to school at an early age will give her a headstart and a chance to develop her own coping skills and a little independence away from me. But how I can deal with it when time comes? Did a few online research and found these helpful tips. Just want to share these ways to my fellow first time mommies to alleviate the stress were feeling.
  • Stay busy. Those two simple words are the key to surviving separation anxiety. Plan ahead and schedule activities before your child leaves, so that you will be occupied in the days after her departure. Even if you don't feel like participating in these activities, go through the motions and allow yourself some time to adjust. Remember how important it is to fill your days, and don't allow yourself to mope around the house.
  • Get support from other parents in similar circumstances. Form a club or start your own Mom's Class or Mom's Summer Camp. Get together regularly to have some child-free fun, or just to share how much you miss your kids. Lean on parents who will understand and empathize.
  • Enjoy your time! Think about all the things you always wanted to do but couldn't, because of your parental responsibilities. Now's your chance! Spend time with a spouse, get involved in yoga, take a class, or redecorate your favorite room in the house. Most parents have a running mental list of projects, but never have the chance to work on them. Consider this free time a golden opportunity.
  • Never make your child feel guilty. It's very likely that your child will pick up on some of your nervousness, but try to maintain a positive attitude. Parental separation anxiety often transfers to children and contributes to their anxiety, which will in turn trouble you and lead to a cycle of guilt. Do your best to be enthusiastic and upbeat about your child's plans. You don't want your child to feel apologetic or to regret his leaving, so make sure that you express only optimistic thoughts.
  • Exchange tokens with your child. Give her something that you made, or a small memento that has meaning for you. Explain the significance of this gift to your child and ask her to give you a small memento, as well. This way, when you are separated, you both will have a souvenir for comfort.

Hope these tips will help us to lessen our worries of being separated with them... temporarily...hehe. I'm kind feeling better now and suddenly got excited for the school scouting when my hubby arrives..lol! :p
***credits to family education for these usefil tips.

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